Ok, I am hesitant to use the word “persecution.” I am reviled in a much more aggressive, offensive way by nonbelievers here. And countless others around the world are persecuted in ways I can’t even imagine. But… there is a special sting all its own when those in the family of Christ look down on you for what you do.
Since coming home, I have felt that sting from people I hold in high regard. And it hurt. In fact, at first, I thought, “Maybe I AM doing something wrong here.”
I think most of you know about where I live. I described it in my last post (8 months ago, haha). It is a very dark place. And I live here. And not only do I live here, but I live smack dab in the middle of the craziness. And when people kept asking WHY I lived here, hinting that I should be living with Christians, in a set-apart environment, free of the dirt and grime of the world, I started to wonder if they were right. And in that case, maybe all the Christians around me were right. Maybe I shouldn’t be living in this place.
But then, I turned to the only One I want to lead me, to guide my path, to make plans for my life. And as usual, He brought me to my knees. He showed me Jackie Pullinger, who lived in the walled city alongside the dying, the prostitutes, the drug addicts. He showed me David Wilkerson, who left everything behind to live among the violent street gangs of New York. He reminded me of JESUS, who came to seek and save the lost. And He gently but firmly assured me that my light was made to shine in the darkness, my life was meant to be spent among the lost, and my heart will always be for the broken. He reminded me that by His grace, He enables me to live set-apart from the world... even in the midst of living in it.
I will freely admit that I don’t always love this life. It’s not glamorous. When I got home after summer I moved in with 6 non-Christian girls. One night I prayed for a way to show them the love of Christ. I woke up the next morning and… well, I don’t want to disrespect my roommate so I’m going to be vague, but God provided a way from me to show her love. I’ll never forget what she said: “I have never had anyone in my life love me so much that they would do that for me.” Two months ago, she accepted Christ, and I can't even come close to explaining the change that has taken place in her heart. From completely enslaved to alcohol, insecurities, and depression, to bold, joyful, and secure in the love of Jesus.
I’m writing this because I don’t think I’m the only one called here. I am praying for more workers. I’ve said it before- the harvest is so, so plenty and the laborers so, so few. I believe that more people are called out, away from their comfort zones, away from their bubbles, than are answering! And I want to see people go. I’m not talking about here, I’m talking about the place God has in store for you.
I would never trade the things I’ve seen here for a safe, quiet life. I’ve seen heroine addicts healed in a split second. I’ve seen people drop their drink, ditch their friends, and RUN to receive prayer. I’ve heard the homeless overflowing with gratitude for the blessings in their lives. I’ve seen street kids light up at being shown the slightest bit of love. And all this is nothing compared to what He has in store for this place! But ultimately, none of that is what it’s about. It’s about Him, His glory, and His renown. And what do man’s opinions of me matter in light of that?
READ THIS BEFORE YOU WATCH: I really want to give everyone an idea of what it’s like here, and what the ministry is like. This video shows a little glimpse of it. I’m not affiliated with this church in any way, but we do come alongside them to do the Jesus Burgers ministry, which consists of handing out free burgers and sharing the gospel with party-goers. There are a few scenes in this video that might be a bit uncomfortable. It’s up to you whether to watch it.
