It's Not Easy, But it is Glorious

I’m assuming that if you’re reading this, you know about my call to open my home to the homeless. After trying to take things into my own hands, then giving it up completely to the Lord, He has brought two girls into my home- as much as my little apartment can hold.

Oh, what a crazy adventure it has been. Sometimes I think of the life I used to have planned for myself, and can’t believe the difference.

This… is hard. Sometimes my house smells like people who haven’t showered in months, and I pray that they won’t see me gag. Sometimes we get 3 hours of sleep because when one person wakes up crying, we cry together. These girls have been through more in their lives than I can even comprehend. Sometimes I don’t know how I’m going to pay my rent, because feeding and clothing and supporting three people is a lot more expensive than just one. Sometimes the house is so full that I lay down underneath my dining room table to pray in the mornings. Sometimes I wish I could have my old friends back, instead of spending every spare moment taking care of others. Sometimes I long for alone time. Sometimes I think I can’t handle this constant front-line battling. And always I am so aware of my inability to do anything without the supernatural strength of my Beloved. Who am I that God would entrust me with anything like this?

But then, there are the other times. The times when the Lord showers out so much love and blessings on me that I think I’m going to collapse. When I put on worship music to clean the house to and one of the girls starts crying because she is in the presence of the Lord. When one of them says “Oh, I’ve never seen an iPod,” and I look at all my posessions differently afterward. When they start talking to God mid-sentence. When their faces light up when I introduce them to a friend. When I come home from work and see them praying over each other. When we go to the park and feed the homeless, able to give because we have been given so much. When friends give me checks out of the blue, without even knowing why. When I curl their hair, or buy them a dress, or take them to dinner, and see a gratefulness on their faces I don’t even know if I’ve ever felt.

Sitting on the couch, we throw our heads back and laugh. We praise the Lord, we pray, we tell jokes, we try to speak in accents, we encourage, we are given words, and we laugh some more. I think about the fact that we have nothing in common, have trouble relating to each other on so many levels, and often don't even understand what each other are talking about, and thank the Lord He has chosen to brings us together. And the laughter outweighs the tears. This life- It is hard, but it is glorious. And there's no place I'd rather be.

For the first time, I understand first-hand what Eric Ludy means when he says that the devil offered him a deal. The things happening here are not without opposition. Will you come alongside us in battle? The war is raging for one of the girls’ souls. I can’t really explain, but she has until Monday to decide which side she will stand on. Please, pray with us.